A Letter to Your Future Self from the Ugly Truth of Your Addiction

It’s a time in your life where the scales are not balanced. You are working so hard to survive but everyone is saying no. There are so many frustrations. Michael J. Rounds is the author of 10,000 Days Sober and an addiction recovery specialist at a correctional facility in Indiana.

  • We strive to help you see that recovery is more than just abstinence from substances.
  • While reading it I really feel that it was your higher power talking to you, through you!
  • You became so lost that the helping hands of others could not even be grasped.
  • When I am actively using, I am not only using substances, but I am using the goodwill and empathy of others.

Because as your future non drug addicted self I know the pain you are going through. I know the pain and I am here to tell you that it ends. I live with substance use disorder. My behavior will always reflect a desire, or the suppression of a desire, to use. The way I treat others is up to me, and me alone. When I am actively using, I am not only using substances, but I am using the goodwill and empathy of others. I am using these substances and people as substances because I do not feel up to the task of caring for myself. For this reason, I will be dishonest, disrespectful, and desperate in the perpetual attempt to suffocate the absence of self-care that I feel on a daily basis.

Why Does Self-Love Matter?

Wow what a beautifully well written letter! While reading it I really feel that it was your higher power talking to you, through you! I wish you peace and happiness and healing. You have talents and gifts that you don’t even realize you have! I, as a mother, would love to see my sober daughter be able to write this letter to herself.

I don’t know what drugs do for a person with addiction to help cope with disappointment. I don’t know how drugs heighten the joy of happiness. But I do know that my life would be very monochromatic without its peaks and valleys. You will marry a man who will love you with all his heart and call you his special angel. You will blossom and love yourself for the women you are becoming – a daughter of God. You will be an instrument in helping and encouraging others trapped in addictions. You will volunteer in the jail and act as a facilitator for a 12-step addiction recovery program. As you work the program repeatedly with the inmates you will grow stronger and stronger in your own recovery.

Essential Reads

My insight into your world is only through observation. I do not wish to walk in your shoes, but I can tell you what it is like to walk in mine – if you are serious about recovery. This is your life, no one else’s. You’re the one in charge of it, no one else. You get to live how you want to live. What other people know or want is irrelevant. This is just about your relationship with yourself. So do you want to live like this? You need to be brutally honest with yourself.

What kind of disease is addiction?

The American Medical Association (AMA) classified alcoholism as a disease in 1956 and included addiction as a disease in 1987. In 2011 the American Society of Addiction Medicine (ASAM) joined the AMA, defining addiction as a chronic brain disorder, not a behavior problem, or just the result of making bad choices.

When the truth is that addiction claims more than double the amount of victims each day. I know you’ve held on longer than you should have. I know addiction has taken as much, or more, from you as it has from me. I know you didn’t make the choice to walk down this road with me. At no point did I make the conscious choice to become an addict and destroy everything I love.

But, recovery seems far away and it seems hard. I’ve tried before and every time I leave treatment, I end up relapsing. I don’t know how to stay sober in the world I live in. There is so much shame and grief. I don’t know how to handle my own feelings without Sober Home drugs. I follow direction, but I am constantly triggered. I know you don’t understand that and I pray that you never will. But, the drugs hold power over me and I fear they always will. I know you wake up every day and the battle for your mind begins.

Is addiction a mental health issue?

These changes affect a person's behaviour, leading to a loss of control over their use of substances or behaviours. Although addiction is not technically considered a mental illness, it is a medical disorder that often co-occurs with mental illnesses.

And there is at least the possibility I can receive some help. When you, as a struggling addict, finally realize and admit that you are not strong enough to defeat addiction alone and you ask for help, that is when you will find freedom. Do not let pride keep you in addiction. The reputation you are trying to protect has already been damaged or destroyed. Whether you realize it or not, the people around you already know about your addiction. The ones that truly care about you will not look down on you for admitting you have a problem and are seeking help.

That Guy You’re With, He Isn’t the One

So, I feel like I’m taking a deep breath and saying to myself, “Okay, Heather. You have to learn to like yourself. Your life really depends on it.” I WISH I WAS TAKING WRITING – I have been in college for wwaaayyy too long. I am glad I have a safe place to unleash my feelings where there is no judgement. Even if you must begin again everyday- do so with the commitment to changing your way of thinking so it affirms your life and it’s importance and does not contribute to keeping you down. This is really just written for me, because I needed to get something out in a supportive environment since for whatever reason it feels difficult for me to feel my feelings otherwise. Kate is a recent college graduate aspiring to create a fulfilling writing career for herself. She mainly operates in the wellness realm, with a focus on women’s health. If you enjoy her work, you can visit her website So Well, So Woman.
addiction letter to self
When you did, you felt ecstatic. You went along blindly with every suggestion, desperate to satisfy your need to feel accepted. I have no doubt from observing you that you hated every day you used substances. I can see how your life was out of control, spiraling into a pit of hurt and despair. You became so lost that the helping hands of others could not even be grasped.

Tips for Healthier Meal Planning

I should abandon my friends, shut out my family. You advised me that I was too smart for school. When I objected that I needed school to find a good career, you told me that I didn’t need a career, that there were other ways of making money aside from hard work. We recommend writing this letter the old-fashioned way, with paper and pen. But since we live in the digital age, feel free to write this via email or you can use a handy tool. No matter what medium you choose, you will need a quiet, private space. The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider. However, you must accept the inevitable discomfort that will come with change- changing your behavior.

I don’t recognize myself in the mirror anymore. Learn more about Clean Recovery Center’s unique Three-Phase Approach and see what a basic timeline of recovery treatment and services looks like for most of our clients. When we are living in recovery our functioning increases to manage the difficulties of life. Unfortunately, these same substances come with addiction letter to self a cost and carry with them the psycho- physiological consequence of addiction. Here at Wellness we believe that alcohol/drug abuse and dependence arise from becoming disconnected from your essential and whole nature. Stay in touch with staff as you may experience uncomfortable physical sensations, irritability, strong emotions, and/or mood changes.
Eco Sober House
Of the neurotransmitter GABA, which produces feelings of calmness and sedation when you drink. However, when you stop, the rebound effect will cause significant anxiety. But please know that the immediate pain you feel now will eventually fade. Read Ron’s letter below and ask yourself if letter writing might be a good option for you. Do movies and TV series that depict protagonists who use drugs advertise drug use,… One of the wonderful choices that you have made is getting married to your wonderful wife, Julie. You just celebrated 25 years of marriage to each other and have been there for a lot of ups and downs in your life together.

Design for Recovery provides structured sober living in Los Angeles, California. Some things are hard to talk about. People find it challenging to open up, especially in the early stages of addiction treatment. So, a goodbye letter to addiction lets you communicate better. If you choose to share the letter with your therapist, it could help you articulate your feelings or serve as a safe form of communication. She earned a doctoral degree in clinical psychology from Alliant International University .
addiction letter to self